A Few Things I Have Learned About Trauma Healing
by Patrique Harris, Youth Ministry Director
As a society, we are experiencing immense loss, pain and suffering, leaving us with grave wounds of the heart. Although talking about our pain can be incredibly difficult, I have learned that it is an essential first step in the healing process. We can help each other heal by creating space for us to share about our experiences. Nonetheless, having these conversations about traumatic events and the emotions that follow can be tough and uncomfortable. We often don’t know what to ask or what to say. From my experience, the most important thing to do is to listen. Here are a few questions I have learned to use when facilitating conversations about trauma.
Do you want to talk?
This question gives someone an opportunity to be heard. I recommend going somewhere safe, private and quiet, where you can talk without interruption.
What happened?
This question helps someone to establish the facts and timeline of the traumatic event(s), which can often get jumbled.
How did/do you feel?
This question allows someone to identify and name their emotions.
What was/is the hardest part for you?
This question helps someone to identify the source of their deepest pain.
What has helped you cope so far?
This question allows someone to share the strategies they are using to cope and gives insight with regards to any additional support that they may need.
When can we talk again?
This question provides someone another opportunity to be heard. Having a consistent person to share with is vital in the healing process.
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10
